Just prior to the recent millennial transition, The Observer polled a cross‐section of British celebrities about their perceptions of paradise. Most of these were suitably vague – perpetual joy, renewed relationships, blissful state of mind etc. – but the anarchic comedian Mark Thomas archly described Heaven as “smelling of bananas”. Off‐hand possibly, flippant undoubtedly, yet Thomas’s remark is strikingly apt, since bananas are the original “forbidden fruit” of the Garden of Eden. Apples are mere interlopers, latter‐day arrivistes that have prospered thanks to the spin‐doctoring tactics of the wily Serpent. This paper, therefore, aims to set the record straight by telling a tall banana tale and explaining how bananamarketing is the future of our field.
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